I’m Maxine, the founder of We Met IRL Speed Dating in New York City. We’ve been around for over 2 and a half years and today I want to tell the story of why I was inspired to start hosting my own events.

My story begins in 2021. After a year of isolation in 2020 due to the covid-19 pandemic, 2021 seemed to offer a new sense of hope. After getting my Moderna vaccine shots right after my 25th birthday in April of 2021, I felt ready and excited to start socializing and dating again. It was also around this time that I found myself getting more and more disappointed with my experiences on dating apps.

I remember always having a disdain for online dating, but I feel like the pandemic drained and disappointed people in a very specific and unpredictable way, and this led to especially lackluster dating app exchanges. It seemed like every man I matched with was putting in less and less effort. I found myself romanticizing the possibility of a “meet cute.”

*Here’s a photo of one of our speed dating events in Brooklyn*

My ideal scenario was that we’d meet at a bookstore as we both grab the same book. I know it’s not the most creative fantasy, but when it comes to romance, the simplest things seem so pure to me. I also always wanted a man that enjoyed reading as much as I do, so meeting at the bookstore was such an ideal setting for me.

I first started thinking about speed dating after receiving an ad for a speed dating event on Instagram. This wasn’t exactly my bookstore meet cute, but there was something so exciting about getting the opportunity to finally meet people in real life. No screens, just short conversations in a bar on a weeknight evening. My only hesitation was that all their event photos had only white people in the photos. As a black woman this was a little alarming to me, but I still wanted to try it for myself. I convinced my friend Cierra to come along with me and it was quite an experience.

*Cierra (left) and I at the first speed dating event I ever attended*

Our main complaints were, 1) a huge lack of diversity, and 2) there seemed to be no age requirement. Another honorable mention was the fact that because of the lack of diversity, it was very obvious that the men weren't interested in talking to us, which wasn’t a great feeling. I remember leaving that night, venting to Cierra about the problems with that event, “I feel like I could do this better.” Cierra replied, “Ok so do it then!”.

I remember at that moment feeling nervous but also so determined. That was November of 2021. After getting the idea, I came up with the name with the help of my family and friends. I hosted my first event in February of 2022, and the rest is history!

A couple weeks ago I came across a Tiktok where the creator mentioned, “ideas are like living things. They hop from person to person until it’s able to be birthed, and actualized.” This is your sign to birth your own idea! The worst that could happen is that you try and fail, but the best that could happen is that you succeed.

If you’re interested in learning how to host your own speed dating events in your city, consider buying my guide for hosting speed dating events and launching a speed dating business. If books aren’t your thing, consider signing up for one of my webinars coming soon this fall!

Why I Started Hosting Speed Dating Events

I judged a heart throb Look Alike Contest